By Selisse Berry—
I remember countless conversations in my 40s with other lesbians about jointly buying a large complex with a pool where we could all retire together. Of course, the price tag in the Bay Area was a bit daunting. And, as I look around the group of women gathered for a lesbian potluck at this over 55 community, Rossmoor, I’m reminded of those conversations and realize that this group has created this dream of community organically.
Since couples and singles buy their own places, no one has to be embroiled in the “Who left the cup in the sink?” conversation. Currently, 200 lesbians are part of the Lesbian Social Club at this Year-Round Summer Camp, Rossmoor, which is just 30 minutes east of San Francisco.
While most of us confess that we’d never picture ourselves living in a “place like this,” the one thing that nearly all people “of a certain age” are looking for is community. And what better place than someplace with 3 swimming pools, tennis and pickle ball courts, and 200 clubs to join from painting to bocce to travel and hiking? And did I mention the 200 lesbians in the Lesbian Club? The same number enjoy the communities in the Gay Men’s Club and the LBGTQA Alliance, all with programs and films and book groups.
Many surveys of older LGBTQ people reflect the realities of going back into the closet when looking for housing later in life because of real or perceived discrimination. The Rossmoor community in Walnut Creek is home to 9000 people, complete with golf courses, pools, and an onsite restaurant. And queer people are able to continue living out and proud with its Lesbian Club, Gay Men’s Club, and the LGBTQA Alliance. As a result, Rossmoor was recently featured in Islands Magazine (https://bit.ly/4ktRUh9) as one of the hottest retirement villages for LGBTQ+ folks here.
Selisse Berry was the Founder and CEO of Out & Equal Workplace Advocates. She is now a Strategic Advisor at the organization LesbianGlobal (https://www.lesbianglobal.org/) and serves as a consultant and nonprofit leader who continues to drive change through advocacy and mentorship.
Aging in Community
Published on February 12, 2026
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