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    Bumpy Rides and Soft Landings: Stories From a No-Holds-Barred Male Flight Attendant

    By Michele Karlsberg–

    Michele Karlsberg: James Pauley, Jr., who has been jet-setting around the world since the late 1970s as a flight attendant, keeps rapt readers turning the pages of Bumpy Rides and Soft Landings,with its stories about coming out, flying high, not learning how to play the piano, and more.

    As someone whose innate filter doesn’t always work, Pauley writes it exactly as he sees it. Crafted in his uniquely humorous, poignant, sarcastic, self-deprecating, honest, and mildly outrageous style, the book has him recounting stories of growing up different, while learning important lessons from even the most unlikely of sources: a chili dog, a nasty queen, a cursing coworker, a Porta-Potty, a stranger’s judgment, a sore butt, a new piano, a tiny scar, a grieving widow, and a hateful bully.

    James Pauley, Jr.

    With the millions of miles he’s logged in over the years, along with the thousands of diverse and colorful characters he’s met and observed along the way, he knows one thing for certain: On this journey called life, with no GPS or autopilot to help us navigate, no one truly knows what their final destination will be. And, because the ride will undoubtedly be turbulent at times, it’s best just to fasten your seat belts, learn from the experience, and always hope for a soft landing.

    Please enjoy the following excerpt from one of the chapters, “A Smile or a Smirk,” included in Bumpy Rides and Soft Landings: Stories of Coming Out, Flying High, and Not Learning to Play the Piano:

    I have loved my career for almost forty-five years. I’ve met and interacted with thousands of people over the years, and when I finally retire from this gig, I might become a therapist. I have no formal training but plenty of hand’s-on, life training.

    I’ve had that same smile plastered on my face for over forty years now. I’ve smiled so much I’ve pulled muscles in my face. I’ve smiled through the threats of belligerent passengers who wanted the beef we just ran out of. I’ve smiled as passengers have foamed at the mouth over seating assignments. I’ve smiled as children spewed their SpaghettiOs all over me. I’ve smiled while being propositioned by the wine-guzzling woman in 4J whose husband just went to the bathroom. I’ve smiled as I threw out three vertebrae while trying to lift a little old lady’s hundred-pound carry-on bag into the overhead bin. I’ve smiled when I realized that I’d been up for twenty-seven hours. I’ve smiled when a four-hundred-pound man said, “I don’t feel so good” just before landing on top of me as he passed out. I’ve smiled upon realizing that the couple in 16A and 16B are not sleeping under the blanket they’re sharing. I’ve smiled as the captain announced, “We seem to have a hydraulic leak and will have to make an emergency landing in Iceland.” I’ve even tried to smile through tears as a young wife told me that the body of her husband, who was killed in an automobile accident, is in the cargo area below. I’ve smiled reassuringly as two hundred people nervously watched my reaction to severe turbulence at thirty-five thousand feet. I’ve smiled through my own personal crises, simply because it felt better to smile than curl up into a little ball.

    All these years later, I’ll probably keep on smiling. It just seems easier to do so in hopes that the whole world, or at least a part of it, will smile right back.

    For more information on James Pauley and his work: https://www.jpauleyauthor.com

    Michele Karlsberg Marketing and Management specializes in publicity for the LGBTQ+ community. This year, Karlsberg celebrates 34 years of successful marketing campaigns. For more information: https://www.michelekarlsberg.com

    Words
    Published on August 10, 2023