Tom Moon, MFT
Q: I’ve been using crystal meth for years, and I know that I’m addicted to it. It’s hurting me mentally and physically. I lost a boyfriend because of it, and I’m pretty sure I’ll lose my job if I don’t stop using. All I’ve been able to do so far is go from using every week to using about every four to six weeks. When the urge to use hits, I can’t think about anything else. Do you have any practical advice on how to fight it?”
A: I applaud your commitment to get this dangerous and destructive substance out of your life. Recovering from meth addiction is challenging, but I’ve seen many people do it. Here are a few suggestions that might help:
Understand that cravings are part of the process of recovery. One of the most common causes of relapse is underestimating the difficulties. Recovery is a long-term process, and cravings can return months or even years after you stop using. But like all feelings, cravings arise, stay for a while, and then fade away. Whenever the desire to use arises, remind yourself that, whether you use or not, it will pass.
Make your motto “one day at a time.”
This is one of the wisest suggestions in the twelve-step programs. You may want to quit for “forever,” but all you can ever actually do is stay clean today. Stay in the immediate present, and don’t dwell on fears about what might happen tomorrow.
Don’t “romance” your drug use.
Crystal memory is notoriously selective. When you want to use, you’ll tend to remember the peak of the high, and forget what it feels like to come down, the black hole depressions that follow, or the days when you feel like a walking corpse. To correct this cognitive bias, write out a description of every- thing you can remember about how you felt after the last time you used. Make a list of all the negative effects crystal has had on your life, and read it back to yourself every time you feel tempted to use.
Don’t do it alone!
Staying clean is much easier if you have people in your life who know what you’re going through. Don’t be afraid to get as much support from others as you can. It can really help to talk with others who have succeeded in staying clean for a year or more, because they’ll serve as visible proof that recovery really happens, and isn’t just a pipe dream. The twelve-step programs offer extensive support networks. Many people who are turned off by the spiritual approach of these programs and want a more secular process have found the program of LifeRing helpful. (http://liferingsf. org/)
Identify your “triggers” and stay away from them.
A trigger is any person, place, or activity that has become associated with using crystal. Most people find that they have to stop hanging out with friends who get high, and especially that they have to sever relationships with sex buddies who use. For many people, their computers or cell phones have become triggers. It’s often important to stay away from hook-up websites, especially those where people are looking to “party and play.”
Be honest with yourself about other drugs, including alcohol. You may or may not have a problem with any other substances, but some people find that using alcohol and marijuana causes their resolve to fade away, so that they suddenly find themselves calling their dealer or trolling the Internet for a connection. Some people find it necessary to stay away from all mind-altering substances for some months, and in some cases, permanently.
Finally, if you do succumb to the temptation to use, get right back on the horse.
Most of the people I know who have overcome this addiction have had to make multiple attempts. It’s not what we want, but, realistically, in the process of recovery from any addiction, the possibility of relapse exists and must be taken seriously. If you do have a slip, see it as nothing more than a temporary setback, Beating yourself up for being “weak” or a “failure” won’t help you achieve your goal. The most important thing is not to let passing disappointments become permanent resignation. Don’t give up!
Tom Moon is a psychotherapist in San Francisco. To learn more, please visit his website at tommoon.net
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