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    Sister Dana sez, “April showers bring May…”

    Words of Wisdumb from a Fun Nun–

    By Sister Dana Van Iquity–

    Sister Dana sez, “April showers bring May flowers—but enough with the FLOODS already!”

    The legendary Cockettes, featuring original Cockette Scrumbly Koldewyn, emerged to give us COCKETTESRES-ERECTION, a colorful musical mayhem revue featuring both new songs and classic Cockettes numbers. Assistant Director/performer Birdie-Bob Watt and Producer Dan Karkoska made all this possible. This was not your typical drag show that the right-wing Repugnicans rage against; this was a professional singing, dancing, tapping, teasing, vamping, X-rated cabaret that made you cheer, laugh, and maybe cry a little. Also performing were Jordan “Sunshine” BontragerMatt Bratko, Noah Haydon, Christian HeppinstallKitten On The Keys, Carl Linkhart, Steven Satyricon, Aaren Shari-ah Smith, Bonni Suval, and more. The fun happened March 23, 24, and 25 at OASIS. And I am particularly pleased to announce they are taking the show to NYC in September. Meanwhile, catch the Cockettes at the Sisters’ Easter in the Park extravaganza!

    We Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence are celebrating EASTER IN DOLORES PARK on Sunday, April 9. This is the second year returning to an in-person event—again in lovely, spacious, very green Dolores Park. Easter also marks the 44th anniversary of The Sisters, who started when a couple of gay men donned nuns’ habits and went to the Castro on a lark, and thereafter realized there was a need for nondenominational and nonjudgmental ministry.

    This year’s theme, “PEEP SHOW,” will explore all the permutations from sugary sweets to North Beach diversions. Showing off our “family values,” the day will begin at 10 am with Children’s Easter—featuring a special appearance by the Easter bunny, an Easter egg hunt, story time, and other family friendly activities. At the conclusion of Children’s Easter, the community should be advised that the show becomes more adult oriented as the day progresses. While nudity and profanity are prohibited, some parents may find the content objectionable for children under 16 years of age. Of course, there will be plenty of drag on display, so if you are the least bit dragphobic, you should stay home and pout.

    At noon, San Francisco trans activist, performer, and RuPaul’s Drag Race star Honey Mahogany will take the Main Stage to host a variety show full of fierce performers, surprise guests, and sister miracles. This year’s lineup features San Francisco favorites Connie Champagne, Kitten on the Keys, Polesexual, Baloney, THE COCKETTES featuring Steven Satyricon, Trixxie Carr, and a Drag Revue starring Linda Summers, Christina Ashton, Nikita Vega, Theresa Giudcoochie, and Tony OMFG! Throughout the day, the audience will take center stage as they show off their Easter spirit competing in the colorful Easter Bonnet contest. And, of course, Easter in Dolores Park would not be complete without the world-famous Hunky Jesus and Foxy Mary contests. The contests (traditionally judged by Sister Roma and yours truly) are open to all! Potential contestants are asked to arrive wearing their Easter bonnet, Foxy Mary or Hunky Jesus looks, and line up backstage when the contest is announced from the main stage. There will be an initial screening process to determine which contestants are most divinely fabulous and invited to move on to the stage. Our event is free, although we nuns always encourage donations that allow us to continue doing our good works and giving to worthy charities. Sister Dana sez, “Happy Easter, everyone—and I’ll see all you peeps in The Park!”

    Several hundred San Francisco students and their allies joined a nationwide walkout on March 31 to stand with queer and trans youth protesting conservative attacks on LGBTQ youth rights. SAN FRANCISCO LGBTQ WALKOUT, held on national TRANSGENDER DAY OF VISIBILITY, assembled protesters at Patricia’s Green in Hayes Valley before marching to City Hall. Supervisor Matt Dorsey and noted trans advocate Honey Mahogany were among the emotional speakers.

    San Francisco drag icon, founder of Oasis nightclub, and community leader Heklina passed away on April 3 while in London with fellow drag performer Peaches Christ in the parody, Mommie Queerest. Rest in peace and power, dear friend Heklina.

    Hunter Harvey‘s “GO WEST” is currently on display at Schlomer Haus Gallery, 2128 Market Street. Many art works in this show reimagine iconic characters from American pop culture. Through painting, these characters are seen as queer heroes navigating their own personal journeys toward a better world out West.

    CASTRO ART MART, which features LGBTQ artists, live music, and drag performances every 1st Sunday of the month, is on May 7, Noe Street @ Market Street (next to the Lookout Bar) 11–5 pm.

    San Francisco AIDS Foundation/ STRUT at 470 Castro Street will be exhibiting QUEER GARDEN” on April 7, 8–10 pm. This is the Art Opening and Reception for the work of JESSJAE. The artist’s name is Jessalyn Ragus, but mostly goes by the art name JesseJae. They moved to San Francisco from a small farming community in the Central Valley in 2011, received a BFA in art from AAU in 2015, and have been working in freelance art ever since. “I am mostly known for my collaged Erotic Tarot Deck, the ‘Tarot Erotique’ and work as a Tarot reader, tattoo artist, printmaker, and painter in acrylic, watercolor and oil,” says JessJae.

    We members of KREWE DE KINQUE (the social, charitable Mardi Gras-themed club) are overjoyed to announce our anniversary celebration, BAL MASQUE XX on April 15, 6 pm at The Café in the Castro, 2369 Market Street. Costumes, masks, and beads are always heartily encouraged. KDK King & Queen XIX, Mark Hankins, Jr., and Tawdry Hepburnn, invite you to celebrate this year’s Masked Ball—with a spectacular San Francisco-themed, costumed tableaux show, state-of-the-art lights and sound, and festive decor. Earn some beads on the dance floor with DJ Sergio Fedasz & hot Go-Go dancers bumping up the party. The Celebrity Grand Marshal will lead a Second Line Parade, and the new King & Queen XX will be crowned. Bid on exciting silent auction items, take a chance on great raffle prizes, enjoy Jell-O shots, the fab drink special, and full bar service. Proceeds will benefit the LGBTQ+ Ukraine Emergency Fund managed by locally-based RAINBOW WORLD FUND assisting LGBTQ Ukrainians in and out of the country. BTW, our masked ball theme is “The 415,” the beloved area code of our origin. “Let the Good Times Roll!”

    The March SOMA SECOND SATURDAYS—a joint project of the LEATHER & LGBTQ Cultural District, Folsom Street, and the SOMA West Community Benefit District—had to be cancelled, due to leaking from the severe storm at the Folsom Street Community Center. But they will return to the fresh air on Saturday, April 8, noon to 5 pm. 12th Street, between Folsom and Harrison. Artists! Artisans! Entertainment!

    “WOKE” has become the MAGA maggots’ latest boogeyman against Democrats. A study has found that since 2017, the number of times Fox News has used “woke” has grown from double digits (96 times) to triple digits (339 occasions) in 2018, 2019, and 2020; but in 2021 and 2022, the “woke” usage numbers have quadrupled. In 2022, the w-words were stated a mind-boggling 1,087 times! Sister Dana sez, “Let’s us progressives drop the use of ‘woke’—and if we absolutely must use it, properly turn it to the grammatically correct ‘awakened.’ We need to WAKE up!”

    Across the country, state legislatures have been proposing and enacting an increasing number of bills that are harmful to the drag, transgender, and gender-nonconforming communities. The ACLU is currently tracking 430 anti-LGBTQ bills, fueled by extreme right-wing politicians, media, churches, and more. These bills target everything from what can be said and taught in schools, to which books can be read, to banning drag performances, and banning gender-affirmative care for trans youth. The cumulative effect is dangerous, as it affects the physical and mental health of trans people, the safety and livelihoods of drag artists, and the basic rights of LGBTQ people everywhere.

    Therefore, DRAG UP! FIGHT BACK! on April 8is a rally and march in support of the drag, trans, and gender-nonconforming communities, and a call to action to stop the hatred being directed toward them. The Rally begins at 11 am at San Francisco City Hall, 1 Dr. Carlton Goodlett Place, and the March begins from City Hall at noon, then proceeds to Union Square for performances.

    I am so thrilled that in response against “Don’t Say Gay” anti-LGBTQ Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, the WALT DISNEY COMPANY will host a massive LGBTQ rights OUT & EQUAL CONFERENCE in Central Florida this September 11–14. Sister Dana sez, “That’s so gay, so: say gay!”

    Kyrsten Sinema is now fundraising on a Republican website—and she’s doing big money events with Republican donors. It makes sense because Sinema is a hero to Republican donors after watering down the Democratic economic agenda—raising Pharma prices and giving tax breaks to billionaires and Wall Street. Sister Dana sez, “We knew it was unfortunate that Sinema is openly bisexual, but now we know that unfortunately she is a closeted Republican!”

    Now, progressive Arizona Congressman Ruben Gallego is running for Sinema’s seat in the U.S. Senate in Arizona. Ruben voted to keep bank regulations strong and to protect everyday people. He has a long history of fighting for progressive causes and a proven track record of electability in Arizona, a state that proved in 2020 and 2022 that real Democrats can win statewide.

    FABULOSA BOOKS, 489 Castro Street, on April 13, 7–9 pm, is having a free reading by Orlando Ortega Medina of his riveting novel THE FITFUL SLEEP OF IMMIGRANTS. Attorney Marc Mendes, the estranged son of a prominent Rabbi and a burned-out lawyer with addiction issues, plots his exit from the big city to a more peaceful life in idyllic Napa Valley. But before he can realize his dream, the U.S. government summons his Salvadoran life-partner Isaac Perez to immigration court, threatening him with deportation. Exciting!

    The far-right’s crusade against education has reached a new level. AMERICAN LIBRARY ASSOCIATION reports a record number of demands to censor library books in 2022: 1,269 demands amounting to a staggering 74% increase from 2021. Sister Dana sez, “Ironically, one of their banned books is ‘FAHRENHEIT 451,’ a book warning against autocrats banning books—the title being the temperature at which books burn. Wow! What a BURN against today’s ‘bad’ book-banning Republicans!”

    Sister Dana Sez, Words of Wisdumb from a Fun Nun
    Published on April 6, 2023