Sister Dana sez, “Can you believe the do-nothing Repugnicans are actually suing President Obama for doing his job?! Really? I mean – reeeeeally?!!”
By Sister Dana Van Iquity
UP YOUR ALLEY LEATHER FAIR was last Sunday. It was truly lovely leather weather (say that three times fast), and the heat brought out many a weenie waving in the wind and other forms of semi-nudity to full undress at the clothing-optional fair. Sister Dana the fervent reporter was seeking out something new under the sun; but alas, this nun found none. Perhaps I am just too jaded – having gone to every EssEff leather fair since the dawn of time.
There were furries, plushies, leatherfolk, rubberfolk, and all manner of costumes. An S&M t-shirt spotted: “I always hurt the one I love” as a takeoff on the classic song. Steamworks featured their traditional Naked Twister Game: “left hand red on butt” with participants putting themselves in precarious positions. Every imaginable sexual accoutrement was available for sale, as was every possible taste in adult DVDs. The Official Folsom Leather Gear booth offered myriads of ways to express leather pride – from head to toe. UCSF Health Alliance offered free rapid testing for HIV. SF Department of Public Health had their usual dildo ring toss for prizes. Resources for trans men who play with men had info at tm4m.org. K9 Unit housed human puppies in cages to be petted and pampered. Careful! They might bite! The 15 Association gave out pamphlets for safer SM play. There you could strap yourself to a St. Andrew’s Cross for a whipping, spanking or flogging. SF AIDS Foundation and Magnet had various pamphlets for safer sex and a “Name That Hanky Code” game. My favorite booth is always the Bare Chest Calendar benefiting AIDS Emergency Fund and Positive Resource Center. Of course there was dancing in the streets to hot leather beats.
I ran into the always gorgeous Tita Aida at the Asian and Pacific Islander Wellness Center booth, where she told me of her recent return from the International AIDS Conference in Australia. She said the global situation is bad, what with human rights violations and transgender discrimination; but they are hopeful by 2020 with education and medication to have an AIDS-free generation. Amen to that!
GLAAD (GAY LESBIAN ALLIANCE AGAINST DEFAMATION) rewrites the script on LGBTQ equality. As a dynamic media force, GLAAD tackles tough issues to shape the narrative and provoke dialogue that leads to positive change. GLAAD protects all that has been accomplished and creates a world where everyone can live the life they love. That’s why the public is invited to celebrate the most outstanding images of the LGBTQ community in the media at the largest, most visible queer gala in the nation, the GLAAD MEDIA AWARDS. Held in New York, Los Angeles, and San Francisco with over 5,000 attendees, the 25th annual GLAAD Media Awards bring celebrities, corporate partners, media professionals, and young adults together in support of GLAAD’s mission to amplify the voice of the LGBTQ community and achieve full equality. This year’s SF GLAAD Media Awards is held September 13th at Cityscape, high above the SF Hilton hotel.
Prior to the big event, GLAAD threw a launch party at Cityscape to talk up the awards gala. Lauren Custer Dowling, vice president of development, noted the theme is “Game Changers,” and will focus on the tech world – Silicon Valley, for instance. Ricky Carter, special events associate manager, revealed a few of the celebrities that will be featured, including Peter Paige of Queer As Folk Fame, co-producer with Jennifer Lopez of TV’s The Fosters; Alex Newell who plays trans teen Unique on Glee, outspoken LGBTQ ally Meghan McCain, and Taryn Manning, who is Tiffany “Pennsatucky” Doggett of Orange Is the New Black. The plaintiffs from HBO’s Case Against 8, Sandy Steir & Kris Perry, will also be honored. glaad.org
RUNWAY 26, VILLAINS & FEMMES FATALES was the MR. & MISS GAPA PAGEANT at Marines’ Memorial Theatre, hosted by Tita Aida. The three competitive segments were Themed Costume, Fantasy, and Eveningwear/Interview. It was the time for Mr. and Miss GAPA 2013 Sir Whitney Queers & Khmera Rouge to step down as they lip-synched “I’ve Had the Time of My Life” from Dirty Dancing. But suddenly Khmera’s evil twin had Sir Whitney blindfolded and kidnapped. Tita had a selfie on a stick to photograph everyone. She gave a shout-out to Sister Dana and threw a fake snake at this rather surprised nun. Tita introduced the Miss GAPA candidates: Brenda Dong, Carney Asada, Lily Rose, Livivan Truong, and La Moni Stat, and the Mr. GAPA contestants: Demigod Roki of ASSGuard, Kenekai Carson, and Franz Vincent Lacanlale.
For the fantasy section, Lily (having run for Miss GAPA for five years) held the Susan Lucci of GAPA title, and bitterly ripped her tiara into bits. La Moni Stat was the Indian goddess Kali with all six arms waving in a dance. Roki was instructed onscreen by another god, and then broke into the YMCA dance. Carney was a bearded version of the Sunset Boulevard dame singing live from that stage musical. Kenekai gave a moving monologue about his scary diagnosis and responding, “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” Livivan danced and interpreted an unrequited love affair. Franz must have sensed victory, as his t-shirt said: “Mr. GAPA 2014.” He led the audience in a cheer and the “Olé, Olé, Olé” song. Last but not least was Brenda (whom we recall last year pelting the audience with her fried chicken). This year she was a bizarre entertainer at a children’s birthday party – smearing the cake all over her naked (fake body suit) body. Halftime entertainment was by the Rice Rockettes doing a sexy number, “Cell Block Tango,” from Chicago. For his swan song, Sir Whitney sat blindfolded at a keyboard, playing and singing “Titanium,” and then still blindfolded performing amazing acrobatics (he is, after all, a member of Cheer San Francisco), flying high in the air and into the arms of his fellow cheerleaders. For her final presentation, Khmera screened a video of her many appearances over the year to the song, “Lady in Red.” Finally the judges (Kristina Wong, Kat Evasco, Jesse Mandapat, Trevor Nguyen, and Holy McGrail) returned with the results: first prince and princess were Kenkai and Carney; second prince and princess were Demigod Roki and Lily Rose; and welcome your new Miss GAPA Brenda and Mr. GAPA Franz!
CUMMING UP!
SEX AND THE CITY LIVE has a very short run this time around, and unfortunately must end August 10th. After selling out its run in June 2012, and its sold-out smash run for 11 months in 2013, Sex and the City: LIVE! is back with two brand new episodes: Thursday, Friday, Saturday, 8pm; Sunday, 7pm at the Victoria Theatre, 2961 16th Street (between Mission & Capp Streets). Tix are $30 at sexandthecitylive.eventbrite.com. If you haven’t come to know this talented trio of drag queens, it’s high time you did discover them: Heklina as Manhattan fashionista Carrie Bradshaw, D’Arcy Drollinger as oversexed Samantha Jones, and Lady Bear as lovable Miranda Hobbes, with Alaska from RuPaul’s Drag Race as practical Charlotte York. Playing Mr. Big is delightful drag king Leigh Crow, along with two studs, Jordan Wheeler and Andy Alabran. As always, the show begins with a video takeoff on the HBO TV show’s Carrie getting her designer dress splashed by a passing car. And, as usual, Carrie’s inner monologue (silent to the other characters) constantly narrates the action for us. After each segment an appropriate well known song snippet plays as a witty editorial of the previous scene. Feel free to sing along.
Episode one is all about monogamy. Who wants it and who has no need for it? When does one assume monogamy kicks in? After the first date? The fifth? When does sex become routine or – worse yet- nonexistent? Can one substitute chocolate for sex? How far does one draw the line in sex? What’s totally taboo? At what point in the relationship can one comfortably pass gas? These and other captivating questions will be addressed and undressed (get ready to see bare butts and torsos) in this silly, sensible, sexy show.
Noe Valley artist Irene Hendrick is displaying her acrylic and watercolor works, BIG HEART ART, through August at Olive This Olive That, a proudly lesbian-owned shop at 304 Vicksburg offering all things olive – including olive oil, tapenade, and balsamic vinegar (I recommend the coconut flavor). The theme is reminiscent of her childhood in 1940s Britain. My two faves are “Some Like It Hot” and “Does Your Mother Know” with queer subtext. irenehendrick.com and olivethisolivethat.com
THEATRE RHINOCEROS presents THE HABIT OF ART, a very British comedy by Alan Bennett (The History Boys) directed by John Fisher, return engagement, through August 23rd, Wednesdays – Saturdays, 8pm; Saturday matinees, 3pm, Eureka Theatre, 215 Jackson Street. therhino.org
Sister Dana sez, “The New York Times just put at 60% the chance that Tea Party RepubliCAN›T extremists will gain control of the Senate. We absolutely cannot let that happen!!!”
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