Sister Dana Sez: Words of Wisdumb From a Fun Nun

sisterdanaBy Sister Dana Van Iquity

Sister Dana sez (in a N’Awlins drawl), “May I be the first to wish y’all a Happy Mardi Gras?! And show me somethin’, mister!”

Come celebrate MARDI GRAS 2014 on Saturday, March 1st, 7-11pm with SF’s KREWE DE KINQUE! Our BAL MASQUE XI – MARDI GRAS MAGICK will sweep you up in all things Coven, Occult, Voodoo & Magik…while raising funds for SF Night Ministry for those in need on the street. We’re transforming Club 180 at The ARC (1500 Howard at 15th Street) into a Bourbon Street Boudoir, so you Betta Show Us Somethin’ to EARN YOUR BEADS! The Masked Ball starts with our famous VIP reception featuring an open bar, live music, silent auction preview, and fabulous Creole/Southern cuisine ($50 advance). General admission is 8pm with free beads, DJ Shaun P, silent auction, a spectacular tableaux show including music artists, drag performances, comedy, and the crowning of the new King XI & Queen XI! Kicking off the festivities at 8:30pm is our Grand Marshal and SF Impresario Patrik Gallineaux! (What will he wear?!). sfkinque.com.

Join KREWE DE KINQUE for our ANNUAL FAT TUESDAY BAR CRAWL aboard the KDK Party Bus! Put on your finest mask and costume, and join us for a Kinky Night on the Town! Tuesday, March 4th, 6pm to midnight (and beyond!) starting at the Edge in the Castro. Booze on da bus. Tickets are very limited and only $20 in advance from King X Kippy Marks: kippymarks@yahoo.com or (415) 574-5639. Queen VII Sister Dana sez, “Let the good times roll!”

SAN FRANCISCO EQUALITY AWARDS KICKOFF COCKTAIL PARTY was held at Jones lounge as an informative meeting and encouragement to attend the EQCA AWARDS on April 12 at the Palace Hotel, where Frenchie Davis of American Idol and Vocal Rush of TV’s Sing-Off perform. EQCA will honor Lieutenant Governor Gavin Newsom with the Vanguard Award. Event co-chair Bevan Dufty said Equality California is the largest statewide LGBTQ advocacy organization in California working to secure full and lasting equality for and acceptance of LGBTQ people. Over the past decade, EQCA has partnered with social justice advocates, businesses, grassroots supporters, and legislative leaders to strategically move California from a state with extremely limited legal protections for queer people to a state with some of the most comprehensive human rights protections in the nation. Dufty introduced openly gay Supervisor David Campos, who is running for state assembly and is endorsed by EQCA. Campos said it was important to continue the unbroken tradition since 1996 of “sending a queer voice to Sacramento” and of building coalitions the way Harvey Milk did decades ago. Campos is running in Milk’s district. Campos is also addressing the housing crisis in San Francisco, where 30% of the homeless population is queer. Executive Director John O’Connor spoke of the importance of lobbying for civil rights, saying, “If you don’t have a seat at the table, you are on the menu!” He emphasized that our same-sex marriage victory is just the start of the fight for human rights and full equality.

EQCA congratulated Assemblymember Toni Atkins on being chosen Speaker of the California State Assembly. Atkins, who represents Assembly District 78, last year authored AB 1121, which simplified the process for name changes to reflect a person’s gender identity. She is only the second Democratic woman and second member of the LGBTQ community to hold the post.

VALENTINE’S DAY was different this year. We SISTERS OF PERPETUAL INDULGENCE passed out over 500 home-made Valentines cards to strangers in the Castro, as well as candy kisses and condoms. This will become our annual tradition, reaching out to those who may not be excited about that fake Hallmark card holiday. Thanks to Novice Sister Jendra Uforia for creating this lovely event.

Then at night I attended the HORRORS OF LOVE HAUNTED HOUSE at the Center for Sex & Culture. It was put on by the communities that bring us Faetopia and Zombie Christ, who created a labyrinth filled with interactive performance and visual arts tableaus that awed and appalled: an artistic chimera exploring the sinister and sometimes sadistic sides of love, in the typically hilarious flare of the radical faeries and queerdos by the Bay. The scariest part was the love zombie who kept tearing at my heart and complaining about our breakup. As “I Will Always Love You” cloyingly played, he tried to hold me back. Well, we HAD to break up: he only wanted me for my brain! This is a fun group with great parties: feyboy.com.

On February 12th, national FREEDOM TO MARRY DAY, same-sex couples and supporters celebrated the 10th Anniversary of the marriages that began in San Francisco City Hall on February 12th, 2004. Couples and supporters gathered in the City Hall Rotunda and proceeded to the Clerk’s office to thank the City and County for marrying over 4,000 couples and for standing up for the freedom to marry. One couple’s placard stated, “A Newsom Twosome: Married Ten Years,” referring to then-Mayor Gavin Newsom, who decreed legalized same-sex marriage in SF. After that, the City’s official commemoration, WINTER OF LOVE, took place back in the Rotunda. Lieutenant Governor Newsom accompanied Phyllis Lyon, the very first couple he married (to the late Del Martin). Many politicos and equality organizations attended and spoke, including NCLR Executive Director Kate Kendell, who reminisced about that landmark day and its unhappy revocation, and Mayor Ed Lee, who presented the Key to the City to Newsom. City Hall would now be lit up in rainbow lights through the Sochi Olympics in demonstration against Russian homophobia.

My good friend and fellow Bay Times columnist STU SMITH passed away February 3rd with his partner and soul-mate, Dave Earl, by his side. Stu had been a life-long volunteer for causes ranging from St. Anthony’s Kitchen, The San Francisco Firefighters Toy Program, Shanti Project, and Positive Resource Center to Applied Aquatics Institute, and The San Francisco Publicity Club. Additionally, he was a member of the LGBT Task Force. He became very active in Shanti, including four terms as board chair. I will miss him so so much.

CUMMING UP!

Join us for sparklers, sweets, and spectacle in a home-spun salon featuring a private Queer art collection in a magnificent Castro Victorian, February 23rd 3-5pm. THE HOMO FILE SALON TWO will celebrate the life of Gay iconoclast Sam Steward, the sexiest English Lit. professor on campus, who was also a seminal tattoo artist, pioneering gay author and sexual rebel. The event will include live music, speakers and rare sexy visual treats — plus an unveiling of Steward’s artwork in this exceptional Queer Art collection supporting the May 2014 premiere of Homo File at CounterPULSE for the National Queer Arts Festival. http://us1.campaign-archive2.com/?u=92079825fa8169bfbd45bf819&id=3b1e227eed

FLESH, FETISH AND FAIRYTALES: DRAWINGS BY KERRY KELLY AND KAREN THOMAS are on display at the Center for Sex & Culture, 1349 Mission Street, now through March 29th. Gallery hours: Mondays, 11:30-4 pm, before events or by appointment. Kelly’s series of drawings, “The Dirty Girl,” highlights sexual activity among disparate age groups. Often focusing on the elderly bodies that are more than sexually active – they are kinky, aware, mischievous, and fully engaged with their bodies and desires. Thomas’ overtly erotic drawings and paintings are filtered through her personal philosophies on mythology, Catholicism, ritual, fairytales, feminism, and eroticism. sexandculture.org/gallery.

SH*T & CHAMPAGNE is extended through March 1st at Rebel, 1760 Market Street, starring D’Arcy Drollinger, Matthew Martin, Peter Griggs, Steven LeMay, Alex Brown, and Nancy French. Directed by Drollinger and Laurie Bushman, D’Arcy’s tribute to female empowerment and the low-budget exploitation films of the 70’s delivers eighty minutes of high-kicking, butt-whomping, dance and comedy. Fridays, Saturdays 8pm. rebel-sf.com. 
CORONATION 49 – “A KILLER VIEW” AN EVENING OF INTERNATIONAL MYSTERY BOND STYLE is the biggest night of the year for Imperials as they celebrate the reigning monarchs’ step-down on Saturday February 22nd. This glamorous event will be held at the Design Center Galleria, 101 Henry Adams Street. imperialcouncilsf.org.

Walk the red carpet of the glorious Castro Theater on February 24th, 7pm, with the best and the brightest stars of the nightlife industry and honor the finest in nightclubs, bars, bartenders, and 20 other categories at THE NITEYS. To cast your votes and/or for tickets and more info: niteyawards.com.

ACADEMY OF FRIENDS presents RETURN TO THE EMERALD CITY on Sunday, March 2nd, 5-11:30 pm at Terra Gallery on Oscar Night. This marks the 34th Annual Academy Awards Night Gala with ticket sales benefitting HIV/AIDS services in the SF Bay Area. Amusements abound as your world transforms into an adventure over the rainbow to the Emerald City while flying monkeys, witches, wizards, munchkins, Dorothy and friends will keep you entertained. Watch the Oscars broadcast on big-screen, sample delicious bites from local restaurants and caterers, while sipping champagne, wine, and mixed drinks. Tix, info at (415) 995-9890 or AcademyOfFriends.org.

Golden Globe Award winner Matthew McConaughey (Mud, Magic Mike) delivers a career-defining performance as Texas cowboy Ron Woodroof along with Golden Globe Award winner Jared Leto in drag (both are up for Oscars) in the hugely entertaining DALLAS BUYERS CLUB, the inspiring and powerful story of an imperfect man’s fight for survival during an uncertain time of AIDS in America. It kind of reminds me of the very early days of Project Inform. Brilliantly directed by Jean-Marc Vallée (The Young Victoria), Dallas Buyers Club is now on Blu-ray DVD and On Demand from Universal Studios Home Entertainment. I highly recommend this movie.

Pornucopia: this week’s flick pick (not an Oscar nominee) is Full Release, for a great “massage,” hothouse.com.

Sister Dana sez, “I want to nominate crazy Repugnican Tea Party Senator Ted Cruz for his Oscar winning coo coo performances in Congress that will surely garner Democratic votes nationwide!”

Bay Times columnist Dennis McMillan, aka Sister Dana, with his sketchbook at the Drink n Draw event held on Monday Nights at Moby Dick, a popular Castro bar on 18th Street. PHOTO BY THOMASINA DEMAIO